Saturday, February 27, 2010

I am proud of myself!

"I am proud of myself!"

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It's not often I can sign this about myself. Growing up I have struggled with a very low self esteem; I have finally learned that I do love myself and I really do like love myself as a person, a sister, a daughter, a wife and especially a friend.


It has taken me almost 37 years to arrive at this and it's a beautiful insight into my life. I am able to enjoy my own POVs, debate with others without having to say "We're okay?" Hubby and I have an amazing marriage and what helps this is that we were actually very good friends before we dated. Hubby and I have been married 4+ years now & been together 6+ years as well.


Just recently I left the ALIP program for several personal reasons; I know I will go back to the ALIP program at George Brown College. GBC will be there and so will the ALIP program.


I am proud of myself for accomplishing my life-long goal and dream; to go to college.


Hubby and I are working on accomplishing another one of my life-long dream and that's to be a skin-Mom. I'm already a Mommy; you see, I've been a furMommy to several babies. 


My first was to beloved Misty. My Mosey was my first boy. Beautiful Ashy (A piece of my heart went with you my baby girl, you left me a year ago and I still cry for you. You knew Mommy couldn't see at the right and you were my shadow.) My Wooky, the sweet yet feisty rabbit that witnessed Ashy's death. I had to return Wooky back to her furfamily because I wasn't able to deal with Ashy's death. My Wooky was my first rabbit outside of my family; my sisters and I were raised with rabbits as well as my father was.


My sweet Hannah, our first special needs cat, taught me a lot about patience and understanding her need for space. Hannah taught me a lot by scratching my face. She'd bite me, bite my head and most of the time, her claws would get stuck in my nose. Oh it was always painful but I had to stay calm. I knew Hannah was nervous and scared.


Hannah was originally from Niagara Falls and she was found in Hamilton. Toronto Rescue Society, where Mosey and Ashy were from, rescued Hannah. TRS is a no-kill rescue group. 


Hannah taught me when it was okay to approach her and it was her decision to come to me for cuddling. Right now, Hannah is a Mommy's girl *bigtime* she is jealous of the new addition to the family- very jealous!


Lil-Bit, a very sweet gentleman, came from a Deaf family that moved to a retirement condo community and they weren't able to take their little boy with them. They were heartbroken because their Lil-Bit was their boy since he's 4 years old. I can imagine their pain as Lil-Bit is so sweet and affectionate. My parents took in Lil-Bit and their Daisy can be a bit too much for Lil-Bit. Daisy can add stress to Lil-Bit because she is anti-social and has anxiety tendencies; it does rub off on Lil-Bit.


I brought Lil-Bit with us to our home and he's getting on along quite well with Mosey and Hannah. Lil-Bit has been by my side since we arrived yesterday but I'm proud of myself as normally I would have gone over my way to make sure he was comfortable. This cute boy is something!!


Tactile love,
Patty oxox



Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Just me and my cane..

Just me and my cane

Just me and my cane,
tapping left and right
feeling the wall with my left hand
and the right eye darting in between places.

Just me and my cane,
Feeling the intricate fabric of scarves,
touching the beautiful jewellery,
the saleslady asking if I need assistance.

Just me and my cane,
I motion to my ear,
shake my head and gesture to my eyes
"Just looking, thanks."

Just me and my cane,
my partner in life,
my reassurance, my independence,
Always dependable and always there.

Just me and my cane,
a part of me and a part of who I am.
My eyes, my ears and my voice,
please don't kick my cane.

Just me and my cane,
I am complete with my cane,
complete with full vision
my cane and I.

Just me and my cane,
tall, thin, white with a splash of red,
Fondly called as Dottie by her handler,
Trusty sidekick for life.

Just me and my cane.